Sexual/relationship issues

Although these two issues are normally related, I will firstly look at some of the sexual issues and then I will look at the relationship issues.

The causes of sexual difficulties can be physical, psychological, or both. Sexual difficulties can develop gradually over time or they may occur suddenly. They can develop after an individual has previously experienced enjoyable and satisfying sex or begin early in a person’s life, The problem can be a total or partial inability to participate in one or more stages of the sexual act.

Emotional factors affecting sex include psychological problems within the individual (sexual fears or guilt, depression or past sexual trauma) and/or interpersonal problems (such as marital or relationship problems, or lack of trust and open communication between partners).

There are generally 4 categories of sexual difficulty: sexual desire disorders, sexual arousal disorders, orgasm disorders, and sexual pain disorders.

For both men and women, these conditions may appear as an aversion to, and avoidance of, sexual contact with a partner. In men, there may be partial or complete failure to attain or maintain an erection, or a lack of sexual excitement and pleasure in sexual activity, or premature ejaculation.

There may be medical causes for these disorders, such as decreased blood flow or lack of vaginal lubrication. Chronic disease may also contribute, as well as the nature of the relationship between partners.

Sexual pain disorders affect women almost exclusively, and are known as dyspareunia (painful intercourse) and vaginismus (an involuntary spasm of the muscles of the vaginal wall that interferes with intercourse). Dyspareunia may be caused by insufficient lubrication (vaginal dryness) in women.

Poor lubrication may result from insufficient excitement and stimulation, or from hormonal changes caused by menopause, pregnancy, or breast-feeding. Irritation from contraceptive creams and foams may also cause dryness, as can fear and/or anxiety about sex.

It is unclear exactly what causes vaginismus, but it is thought that past sexual trauma or negative sexual associations can pay a role, however this is not exclusive.

It is important that physical factors are ruled out before commencing treatment with hypnotherapy

Symptoms, Men or Women:

  • Lack of interest or desire in sex (loss of libido)
  • Pain with intercourse (much less common in men than women)

Symptoms for Men:

  • Inability to attain an erection
  • Inability to maintain an erection adequately for intercourse
  • Delay or absence of ejaculation, despite adequate stimulation
  • Inability to control timing of ejaculation

Symptoms For Women:

  •  Inability to relax vaginal muscles enough to allow intercourse
  •  Inadequate vaginal lubrication preceding and during intercourse
  •  Inability to attain orgasm
  • How hypnosis & hypnotherapy can help treat sexual problems
  •  Enabling open and honest communication
  •  Improving body image
  •  Improving balance of relationship
  •  Acceptance of any past events
  •  Removal of negative emotions surrounding sex e.g guilt, fear, performance anxiety, pressure
  •  Isolating root cause
  •  Relaxation
  •  Shifting patterns of past behaviour
  •  Self Hypnosis
  •  Improve self belief, self confidence and self esteem

Physical factors contributing to sexual problems include:

  • Hormonal deficiencies (low testosterone, estrogen, or androgens)
  • Some birth defects Endocrine disorders (thyroid, pituitary, or adrenal gland problems)
  • Injuries to the back
  • Problems with an enlarged prostate gland
  • Problems with blood supply
  • Nerve damage (as in spinal cord injuries)
  • Disease
  • Drugs (alcohol, nicotine, narcotics, stimulants, antihypertensives, antihistamines, and some psychotherapeutic drugs)
  • Failure of various organ systems (such as the heart and lungs)

Relationship Issues

Relationships can bring much meaning and happiness, and it’s usually the relationships we form with others that define our lives. However they can also cause problems and unhappiness if they break down. Whether it’s a relationship with a family member, colleague, friend or lover, everyone will experience relationship problems at some point during their life.

If relationship problems aren’t dealt with they tend to build up over time, and because each individual reacts differently to situations and emotions, it can sometimes be hard to know how to resolve certain issues. Lack of communication can be a major problem in a relationship and not being able to express feelings may create pressure on the relationship.

Unhappy relationships

An unhappy relationship can impact on your happiness in other aspects of your life too. Most people are much more likely to be fulfilled with other aspects of their life if they are in a happy, fulfilled relationship. Relationship issues may involve an individual:

  • Feeling unsure about how or where to meet the right partner.
  • Facing divorce or separation.
  • Facing insecurity.
  • Feeling trapped in a relationship.
  • Feeling confused about whether or not to stay in the relationship.
  • Trying to deal with a partners infidelity.
  • Feeling frustrated by a poor physical and sexual relationship.
  • Wanting to improve their current relationship.
  • Trying to understand themselves and their partner better.
  • Working on communication skills.
  • Trying to increase the romance in their relationship.

There are many reasons relationships may not be working as well as they should be, but with determination, love and understanding, lots of relationships can get back on track. It often takes time, effort and compromise to make relationships work, but if this ultimately leads to a fulfilling relationship it’s usually worth exploring the problems.

How hypnotherapy and counselling can help your relationship

Hypnotherapy and counselling can be used to help relationships in a number of ways, from learning how to relax to building confidence. Specifically, hypnotherapy can help to:

  • Gain new perspectives on relationships and develop an appreciation for another’s position.
  • Recapture the lost feelings of love, friendship and commitment.
  • Re-experience past memories in a more positive way.
  • Learn relaxation techniques allowing you to be calm around each other.
  • Develop a self belief that builds on your confidence and ability to create new and successful relationships.

Strong relationships are about opening communication channels and this can’t work unless you subconsciously open these channels. Hypnotherapy can help you to communicate with your subconscious more effectively, and ultimately enhance communication within your relationship.

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